Mushroom and garlic stuff

This is some tasty stuff, originally created to be a stuffing for home made ravioli.
It works wonders as a spread. Stephanie gets most of the credit for coming up with this one, but I DID help a bit.

You will need:

8 ounces of Baby Bella mushrooms.
3 heads of Roasted garlic.
1 stick of butter.
8 ounces of Mascarpone cheese.
1 tbsp kosher sea salt.
1 tbsp fresh ground black pepper.
1 tbsp McCormick Italian seasoning.
2 tbsp dried basil.
2 tbsp white cooking sherry.
1 tbsp heavy whipping crème.

Some assembly required:

In a food processor chop the mushrooms into tiny bits, (almost a paste).
In a medium sauce pan, over medium heat, melt 2 tbsp of butter.
Add mushrooms, salt, pepper, and Italian seasonings.
Squeeze garlic out of the roasted heads, into a mixing bowl, making sure not to get any of the skins into the bowl.
Using a wooden spoon, smush it up into a paste.
Mix thoroughly with mushrooms.
Sauté until no moisture is left in the pan, (approx 20 minutes).
Add 2 tbsp of White cooking sherry, and sauté for another 3 minutes.
Place cheese into a mixing bowl, and add mushrooms to the bowl.
Mix in the crème.
Refrigerate for 1 hour.

At this point, you can use it as a spread. Cut up some French bread, drizzle some olive oil on one side, smear the mushroom stuff on it and then toast it.
Or, you can stuff it into a pastry tube, and then use it as a stuffing for home made ravioli.
It’s all up to you, however we will not be going into the home made pasta at this time.
Enjoy.

Cottage Pie

Cottage pie is almost like Shepards pie, but it involves fewer sheep. Pour some Bordelaise,over the top of this and serve with a salad.
Serves 4 to 6 people,

You will need:

1 lb ground beef.
1 large yellow onion, chopped into small bits.
4 cloves of Garlic, smushed up and diced.
2 tsp of Emerils essence, (the regular stuff).
1 tsp red chili pepper flakes.
1 tsp kosher sea salt.
1 tsp freshly ground Black Pepper.
8 oz sliced baby Bella mushrooms.
2 tbsp tomato paste.
2 tbsp ketchup.
½ cup heavy whipping cream.
1 cup of Cabernet Sauvignon.
3 Big ass potatoes
½ cup sour crème.
½ stick of butter.
1 cup shredded Cheddar cheese.
1 cup shredded Gouda cheese.

Some assembly required:

First of all, take the potatoes’ and make some mashed potatoes.
Cut them up into small bits and boil them for about 20 minutes.
When done, add ½ cup sour crème, ½ stick butter, ½ cup heavy whipping crème, and 1 tbsp each salt and fresh ground Black Pepper.
Grab a potato masher, and start mashing.

Brown the ground beef, adding onion, garlic, essence, chili flakes and salt and pepper.
Cook until onions are soft.
Add crème, mushrooms tomato paste and ketchup.
Simmer for about 35 minutes, remove from heat and let sit for 10 minutes.
Spoon into a 9 inch by 9-inch glass pan, in a neat layer.
Sprinkle the Gouda cheese on top.
Cover this with the mashed potato and the cheddar cheese.
Pop into a 350 degree oven until the cheese on top turns brown, approx. 40 minutes.
Enjoy.

Rum Cake

There are very few things in this world that are as good as cake. There are very few things in this world as good as Rum. When you put them together, you get Rum Cake, (this stuff is just God damn good).
This is a simple recipe……easy to make, and as a plus, it involves Rum.:)

You will need:

Cake:
1 cup chopped cashews.
1 package Duncan Hines “Yellow Cake” mix, (with pudding).
3 eggs.
½ cup cold water.
½ cup Wesson vegetable oil.
½ cup Meyer’s Dark Rum.

Glaze:
¼ lb sweet butter.
¼ cup water.
1 cup granulated sugar.
½ cup Meyer’s Dark Rum.
BBQ paint brush thingee.

Some assembly required:

Cake…..
Preheat oven to 325 degrees.
Grease and flour 12 inch bunt cake pan.
Chop Cashews really fine and sprinkle over the bottom of the pan.
Mix all cake ingredients together, including Rum. Pour batter over nuts. Bake one hour, or until a toothpick stuck into the cake comes out clean.
Let cool for 15 minutes.
Invert onto a cooling rack on a baking sheet, (to catch all the glaze).
poke a bunch of holes in the top and the sides with something about the size of a chopstick, (this is to let the glaze ooze into the cake).


Glaze…..
Melt butter in a sauce pan, stir in water and sugar.
Boil for 5 minutes, stirring constantly.
Remove from heat, and stir in ½ cup Meyer’s Rum.
Let cool for 10 minutes.

Spoon and brush glaze over the top of the cake, until the glaze is used up.
Let the whole thing sit for another hour, then serve.

Make damn sure the people that partake of the cake have a designated driver, and for God’s sake, don’t let the kids have any of this stuff, unless they already have a history of drug and alcohol use. Enjoy.

Strangely succulent deep-fried chicken breasts

Give this a shot…. It’s some good stuff.

It took me quite a while, but I finally managed to convince my girlfriend that this was NOT something I made up to poison her.
I personally hate traditional fried chicken because, after cooking the drumsticks and the wings, you end up with LIGAMENTS and TENDONS and TUBES in your chicken.Yuck.
This recipe ensures that a boneless skinless chicken breast will turn out tender and succulent, with out having any of the weird bits nomally associated with fried chicken.
Serve this with mashed potatoes, corn bread, a nice salad, and this will be something to tell your grandchildren about. :)

You will need:

4 boneless skinless chicken breasts.
16 oz of clam juice.
4 large cloves of Garlic.
4 eggs.
4 cups of All Purpose Flour.
1 can of Columbo Seasoned French French_Bread Crumbs.
3 cups Buttermilk.
2 tbsp kosher sea salt.
2 tbsp fresh ground Black Pepper.
2 tbsp cayenne pepper.
2 tbsp Paprika.
1 tbsp. Onion powder.
1 tbsp Garlic powder.
¼ cup dried Parmesan cheese (Kraft will do).
Lots of vegetable oil.

Some assembly required:

Take chicken breasts and poke a bunch of holes in them with a fork, on both sides.
Lay them in a baking pan, and cover completely with clam juice.
Smush up 4 large cloves of garlic, then dice. Add to the mix.
Cover and let sit in the ‘fridge overnight….

(Trust me on this; it’ll be REALLY good).

Next day…….
Get a big damn bowl, and add flour, 1 tbsp each of salt, pepper, cayenne pepper, paprika, onion powder and garlic powder. Mix thoroughly.

Take another big damn bowl and add half a can of breadcrumbs, Parmesan cheese, and mix thoroughly.

Take another damn big bowl and whisk buttermilk with remaining salt, pepper, cayenne pepper, paprika and mix thoroughly.

Take a large pan, and add eggs. Scramble thoroughly.

Remove chicken from clam juice, and pat dry, (I know it’s gross, but it’s necessary).
Dip chicken breasts into egg bath, let all the excess goo drip off, and then drop into the flour mixture. Flip it a couple of times, and then shake it about till all the excess flour drops off. Drop it in the buttermilk. Cover with the buttermilk mixture, then let the excess goo to drip off, and then coat with breadcrumbs.

In a large frying pan, pour enough oil to cover the bottom of the pan with about 3 inch’s of vegetable oil.
Heat to 350 degree’s F. Add the hunks of breaded bird. Stir a bit.
Cook chicken for about 8 minutes, or until slightly past golden brown.
Serve up with mashed potatoes and a salad of some kind, and Enjoy.

Stir fried chicken

Credit goes to Stephanie for this one. It’s easy, and it tastes great. Even better, it’s somewhat healthy. It has no saturated fats, few preservatives, and lots of vegetables. It’s a bit spicy though, so beware. Ladle this stuff over steamed rice and you will be nice an’ full……. for about an hour. :)
Serves 4.

You will need:

A Wok.............. (BIGGER is better).
3 sticks of celery chopped up into bits.
1 green Bell Pepper, chopped into medium sized bits.
1 red Bell Pepper, chopped into medium sized bits.
2 Carrots cut into pieces the size of matchsticks, (Julienne style).
1 large Yellow Onion, rough chopped.
2 stalks of broccoli, rough chopped, with the stems cut off and thrown away.
8 ounces of sliced mushrooms.
4 large boneless/skinless chicken breasts, cut into McNugget sized pieces.
½ tsp of Chinese Five Spice.
1 tbsp hot chili oil.
1 tbsp extra virgin Olive Oil.
1 tbsp oregano.
1/4 tsp Cayenne pepper.
4 cloves of Garlic, smushed up and diced.
2 tbsp Rice Vinegar.
2 ½ tbsp soy sauce.
18 0z. World harbors tropical style “Hot Teriyaki” sauce.
½ cup White-cooking sherry.

Some assembly required:

Heat the wok over a hot flame, add olive, and hot chili oil.
Add chicken, garlic, and stir-fry for 5 minutes.
Add cayenne pepper, onion, carrots, and celery.
Stir in vinegar, soy sauce. Add Chinese 5 spice, oregano, and stir-fry for 4 minutes.
Add bell peppers, Teriyaki sauce, and cooking sherry.
Cover and steam for 20 minutes, stirring occasionally.
Add mushrooms and broccoli, cover and steam for another 10 minutes.
Remove from heat, and pour over steamed rice, and ENJOY.